Harken back with us to those halcyon days of yesteryear, when people were watching the Ronald D. Moore television epic BattleStar Galactica and then spending entire working days standing around the breakroom WTFing and OMGing the previous night’s episode. While you and I wrapped up our feelings for the show fucking years ago, Fyre doesn’t watch any television that isn’t on DVD (and almost none that comes from America on top of that) so she’s only just now gotten herself deeply enmeshed in the BSG reboot’s heady web of sexual politics, cosmic nigh-nihilism, and bare robot ass. Let’s join the wutfawmg already in progress…
FyreHaar: we went out to eat
FyreHaar: then went book shopping
FyreHaar: and watched BSF
Sonic Rob: BattlestarmindFuck
FyreHaar: they got Hera back!!!
FyreHaar: I’m so happy!
FyreHaar: Starbuck is such a bitch dude
Sonic Rob: you cannot love her
Sonic Rob: she is too broken
FyreHaar: she needs to get her shit together
FyreHaar: We watched the one with the boxing
FyreHaar: is it just me or is it implied that Adama and Laura spend the night together?
FyreHaar: when it’s all flashing back to New Caprica
Sonic Rob: it is
FyreHaar: I’m glad I’m straight on that
Sonic Rob: they smoked out and got it on
Sonic Rob: I love the first thing they did on that planet was start experimenting with local herb
Sonic Rob: take the edge off and dissolve sexual tension
FyreHaar: I love Gaeta
FyreHaar: great character
FyreHaar: Also, Helo is like the one upstanding guy
FyreHaar: he does some shit but he is a good person
FyreHaar: trying to do the right thing without the burden of command
FyreHaar: he and Sharon are sort of made for each other
Sonic Rob: Helo gets a really uneven treatment depending on who wrote the episode
Sonic Rob: a lot of the time he’s a Mary Sue
FyreHaar: what is a Mary Sue?
Sonic Rob: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/MarySue
FyreHaar: can’t internet right now
Sonic Rob: A Mary Sue is a super-idealized character who is beautiful, kind and morally virtuous at all times
Sonic Rob: usually an author insertion fantasy
FyreHaar: yeah, he is that a lot
FyreHaar: but then he killed the cylons, and that was good for his character development
FyreHaar: he did a bad thing for the right reason
FyreHaar: and then he had to shoot Sharon
FyreHaar: that sucked
Sonic Rob: a lot of the BSG writers user Helo’s conflicts with Adama, Sharon/other Sharon, and Starbuck to work out their Daddy/Wifey/Sister issues
Sonic Rob: and Helo is the stand-in for the author and how he is the right one
Sonic Rob: and also usually the victim
FyreHaar: Starbuck and Lee totally have the sister/lover problem
Sonic Rob: yeah, they are incest fucklers
Sonic Rob: Starbuck is mired in self-hatred
Sonic Rob: born of parental abuse
Sonic Rob: she’s utterly broken
FyreHaar: she wants him but she doesn’t want him
FyreHaar: because he is honest and upstanding
FyreHaar: and he wants to be that way
FyreHaar: and she likes the transgression of it
FyreHaar: and every time he tries to make an honest woman out of her she fights it
FyreHaar: so she wants him but not on his terms
FyreHaar: so he’s not having it
Sonic Rob: yeah, Lee’s problem is that he loves an image of Kara, but it’s not real
FyreHaar: Team Dualla!
Sonic Rob: Poor Dee
FyreHaar: jesus, she should leave him
Sonic Rob: she married a dude who really likes her
FyreHaar: oh god
FyreHaar: he loves her as long as Kara isn’t around
Sonic Rob: aggghh!
Sonic Rob: for real
FyreHaar: he needs to cut bait
FyreHaar: Kara is his friend
FyreHaar: he needs a flaw
FyreHaar: plus we have like two and a half more seasons to go
Sonic Rob: but he’s been in love with her since they were like kids, right?
FyreHaar: well, since he met her at least
FyreHaar: a long long time
FyreHaar: he needs to accept that it’s never going to go where he wants it to go
FyreHaar: he’s like the woman who wants to bad boy to clean up for her
FyreHaar: not gonna happen
Sonic Rob: yeah, and she has Sam, who is so perfect for her that she can’t love him
FyreHaar: she cannot accept goodness into her life
Sonic Rob: “This might work! Fleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!”
FyreHaar: because she has been conditioned to believe that love is abuse
Sonic Rob: there it is
Sonic Rob: and vice versa as well
Sonic Rob: I think her time with Leoben on New Caprica kinda showed her that
Sonic Rob: but she despaired and gave into it
FyreHaar: it reinforced it for sure
Sonic Rob: she could have seen it and fought
Sonic Rob: tried to clean up
Sonic Rob: but old dogs
Sonic Rob: a relationship based on imprisonment, torture, implied rape, and serial murder
FyreHaar: oh god that fucked me up so bad
FyreHaar: when they said they had harvested her ovary and made a kid I lost my shit
FyreHaar: I would start to yell every time they showed that kid
FyreHaar: that’s why she loved that kid
FyreHaar: it totally fit into their pattern for a family
Sonic Rob: yeah, remember when the cylons were running rape farms on Old Caprica to try and make hybrids?
Sonic Rob: they rape humans, it is kinda their thing
FyreHaar: they don’t even understand why the humans don’t like it
Sonic Rob: cylons do not have individuality
Sonic Rob: thus they cannot be violated in that way
Sonic Rob: but I think they understand in a way
Sonic Rob: remember what happened to that one 6 that the Pegasus guys raped almost to death?
FyreHaar: they just don’t care
FyreHaar: yeah, another bad episode for me
FyreHaar: wanted to kill all those fuckers
FyreHaar: alllllllll of them
Sonic Rob: they did, eventually
Sonic Rob: I think almost all of them died on New Caprica at least
FyreHaar: dude I used to like Starbuck but now I want her to go away
FyreHaar: and I want D to leave Lee because he is being a jerk
Sonic Rob: Lee should be alone
FyreHaar: can’t make up his fucking mind, so he shouldn’t get anything
FyreHaar: and Sam and Dualla live happily ever after
FyreHaar: oh, they just boxed Xena
FyreHaar: now I really want to know who the final five are
Sonic Rob: do you know any yet?
FyreHaar: no, just her looking at some dudes all in white and saying that she was sorry to one of them
FyreHaar: so it’s obviously someone we know that she has interacted with
Sonic Rob: NO COMMENT
Sonic Rob: the whole point of this season is for you to think it could be anyone
FyreHaar: well, that’s the whole point of the cylons
FyreHaar: also, caprica 6 is now on galactica!
Sonic Rob: mm
Sonic Rob: and what of the 6 in Baltar’s mind?
FyreHaar: when IRL 6 is around she isn’t
FyreHaar: I wonder if they will fight now
FyreHaar: although when the 6 from pegasus was around, she was
Sonic Rob: that would be crazy
Sonic Rob: cause that is his mental projection of that exact same being
FyreHaar: it’s baltar’s imaginary girlfriend
FyreHaar: of course it’s crazy!
Sonic Rob: it is his memory of a particular 6
FyreHaar: and they aren’t the same at all
Sonic Rob: well, no
Sonic Rob: that is his version, but nobody is like you think they are
FyreHaar: his mental projections is crafty like ice is cold
FyreHaar: I love it when she beats him up
Sonic Rob: Caprica Six I think was changed by the bombing of Caprica, the sneak attack
FyreHaar: why would that change her?
FyreHaar: when she had to face that what she did was kill billions of people
Sonic Rob: sarcasm?
FyreHaar: it became real that she was an agent of genocide
FyreHaar: like when she killed the baby in the first episode
FyreHaar: she realized she was going to hurt it and didn’t want it to suffer
Sonic Rob: so your question is why would that change her?
FyreHaar: no, I’m saying that IS what changed her from the projection in his head to the 6 she is now
FyreHaar: maybe she will start to understand why the shit they pulle don new capricia didn’t work
Sonic Rob: see, that is exactly what I was saying before, that she was changed by the genocide
Sonic Rob: we are in violent agreement!
FyreHaar: argh, I concur!!!!!!